No, we haven’t yet found a cure for the Covid-19 virus. No, we are not close to living in an anti-racist world. Yes, our news feed is overflowing with negative and unjust things right now. Yes, it is in the nature of living that we will forever face such adversity.
There is hope that we will find a vaccine to fight this pandemic. There is hope that one day we will live in an age where racism is history.
Love cannot cure all problems. Love can & always will have the ability to cure the distress we feel as an effect of these problems.
Love is our secret weapon. Remember that we own it and it has infinite use.
Here are some starting points that should remind you why love is so powerful & important.
Love Gives Us Strength.
- A lack of social support and human connection can have long-lasting effects on human beings including higher blood pressure, a weaker immune system and depression
Love Is A Drug.
- You likely all know this one, but hug, kiss & orgasm, and a hormone called Oxytocin will be released into the bloodstream. This reinforces early attachment between mothers and babies and the bonds between romantic partners. This magical drug has the power to make people more social, generous & trusting. (it can also increase pain threshold).
Love Can Make You A More Understanding Person.
- Studies carried out in the early 2000s using MRI scans on the brain show that those experiencing maternal, paternal or romantic love experience the areas of their brain that usually are used for negative emotions, such as social judgement, temporarily deactivated.
It is easy to get carried away with all the amazing and really quite modern scientific research behind love, but let’s not forget also, the multitude of interactions between cultural influences and human behaviour that really, only the love letters, the passionate artwork, the clichéd moments and the old romantic poets can capture….
Love Kills Worry.
- You’ll have noticed long ago that when feeling worried about something, spending a few hours with a loved one or sharing what’s on your mind (regardless of how practical their response is) leaves you feeling 10x better. Love is a worry killer, it’s on your side, it stays there when your happiness doesn’t. Once received, always try to pass it on though, there will be someone who needs your help soon enough.
Love Is Exciting.
- Love can give you unexpected turns in life, it can open your mind to ideas and experiences that would have never come to you otherwise. Even the everyday is more of a buzz when you can share your coffee, your gossip or your shower with someone. (n.b. not suggesting showers with Steve from IT or your little sister.)
Love Can Last.
- Admittedly, we know that not all love is forever, so it is incredibly important to enjoy the Lady whilst she is gracing us with her presence. Love in all duration is a positive. However, love can also last you a lifetime. Spending years with another person will create a tie between you that is stronger than & incomparable to any piece of journalism, any volume of cheese/wine (although that must help) or any self-discovery yoga retreat. You’ll probably need someone to tell you that you’re beautiful & kind at 75, however much of a lie that is.
Love Has Many Forms.
The beauty of living (change the record!..) is that we are surrounded by an absolute wealth of things to love. If you find yourself without another person, without friends, without family to love, or if you have all of these and just have an interest in almost anything, there is something in this world to love. Visit an art gallery and absorb the beauty of the massive range of art. Read a book, you’ll learn so much from books and words are never used in the same way twice. Listen to music, you’ll be able to feel more emotion from music than you might ever have imagined. Go outdoors, see the nature. Step onto the pavement, watch the mechanics of society and all it’s cogs turning together. Work hard, turn giddy with how much success you can create for yourself and for others. Watch a sport, love the player’s passion, their skill, their stamina. Better yet, write, play, walk, run, inspire and create. You’ll find a love - it’s not just first dates, wedding invitations & school shoes.
Love Is Not Guaranteed and Love Has No Definition.
The list could go on, but likely you’re falling asleep, craving a loved one or feeling a bit queasy from the corniness. (Shame on love-shamers). So, remember that love has no definition, love can start one way and evolve into something else. Hatred can be turned into to love. Love is at every turn but if you aren’t open to it, it won’t be of any use to you.
Don’t take love for granted. People go mad, artists turn wild, some people pay/fight/kill in a sad vain attempt to win love. Love is insecure and that is what makes it the desire of so many people and makes it so addictive. Don’t wait for the loss of love to happen before you realise you’ve lost it. Give it, recieve it and most importantly use it to help as many people as you can - it is our secret weapon.
(GO ON, embrace the WFH afternoon delight with your partner. Send your parents some flowers. Have a park beer with your friend. Rally safely in a Black Lives Matter peaceful protest. Donate your time to volunteer to help those affected by the virus ) x
